Thursday, September 12, 2013


I know all the "Sunday School" answers. (And I believe them as well.) I know God's mercy and His strength - I know that he will sustain me and I know that he is good all the time.

But mostly today,  I just feel really really sad.  And really empty - an emptiness that reaches down to my toes.

If I have learned anything in this season is that you should never go through life alone.  You should never live alone - isolated, in your own bubble,, with walls around you.  Because if you live alone, you will die alone.

When we first found out about Dad's cancer, I remember a sacred moment very well.  Dad was talking to Jeremy and he looked up at him,  eyes pleading,  "What are we going to do now?"  Jeremy took his Dad's tired hand in his and said,  "We will put one foot in front of the other, we will hold hands and make it through - step by step; just how we've weathered every other storm.  Together."
I applaud that.  Everything about Dad's life has been together - helping, strengthening, encouraging, building.  His life's passion is for others.

If you don't have someone to walk through life with - find someone.  Live your life with an open heart and outstretched hands.

The doctors say that Dad is dying.  If I am to be honest,  I don't know yet what Jesus says.  But I know what I see.  I see a man vulnerable, weak and tired - and really ready for this journey to be over - one way or the other.  But I will tell you what else I see.  I see a man who threw his whole entire life into the passions of Christ.  I see a man who knows who he is in God.  I see a man who knows his God well and knows His people very well too.

But mostly, I see a man who lived his whole life with arms outstretched, palms up - inviting one more person into his life - one more people group into his world - always building the bridge between man and God; his life's purpose.

So I don't have all the answers.  In fact, today, I don't feel I have any of the answers.  But the one thing I do know is that I don't want to live life alone.  I want to go through pain together.  I want to go through joy together.  I want to tear the walls down around me, to live my life poured out for others.  Because if I don't live alone,  I won't die alone.

I believe in community.  I believe in walking hand in hand with those around me; in sharing my tears and my deep fears.  I believe in linking arms and leaping or treading into the unknown. 

I believe in TOGETHER.


  1. Thanks for sharing this Faith.....God is with each one of us, but you are right-we need one another especially during the times that are tough! Bless you and your families.

  2. Faith you have moved my heart to night my God bless you and help you walk through the day ahead

  3. Thanks for sharing this Faith. I have been so sad all this week. No actually I have been sad since right after Keith's surgery when I kept getting a warning sense every time I prayed... that something wasn't quite right and that it wasn't over. But this week it hit hard, I was confronted with the fact that I couldn't just pick up the phone to ask another question.. Keith will tell you I have a lot of questions and he has always taken time to answer each one. I have also been grieving some of the lost dreams that we were dreaming of doing this next year.. and mostly ... as one who grew up as a spiritual orphan because my parents were atheists.. I am broken over the pain and suffering of one who I call my spiritual dad... and who has been that for so many. I have not stopped praying from a place of authority and victory... because my spiritual papa Keith Hazell taught me to never give up... so I am not giving up... but I hear your heart cry about this thing... and I am very sad too.

  4. So glad that you are in my life. Walking the journey with you all from afar. Lots of love Michele

  5. Wow. So moving and true. Praying for you all.